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Shall I compare thee to a rubber duck?
Thou art more noble and more rubbery
The lowly pigs and cows roll in the muck
But thee, thou brave the bathtub's stormy sea;
Thy yellowness is unsurpassed by any
Thine eyes are full of kindly warmth and light
Thy beak: as sharp as knives - and there are many
Who envy thy fair, streamlined, graceful flight;
Thy quack is sweet, calm music to my ears
Thy wings are soft and downy to my touch
Thy bathtub drowneth all my deepest fears
There never was one who I loved so much:
Fair rubber duck, I ask of you one thing -
For you to be my queen, and I your king.
This is a parody of Shakespeare's Sonnet 18... you can read the original here: [link]

:rofl:

[Image form wikimedia.org]
Add a Comment:
 
:iconcrystal-earth:
crystal-earth Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2008
This is a great parodie ^.^ Its even written in the same old-style English. And I saw you were having trouble trying to find another word for duck that wasnt :censored: . What about cluck or luck? Anyway, awesome work!
Reply
:iconhaikukitty:
HaikuKitty Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2008
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
Awesomeness XDD
Reply
:icontetemeko:
tetemeko Featured By Owner Jun 12, 2008
You are fantastic.
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2008
Lol, thanks :hug:
Reply
:icontwistedxsketches:
twistedxsketches Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2008
Shall I compare thee to a rubber duck?
Thou art more noble and more rubbery


:rofl: THIS IS GREAT!


:+fav:
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2008
:hug: Thanks ;) When I realised rubber duck would fit in the first line I just had to write the rest xD
Reply
:icondarkestpoetrylover:
darkestpoetrylover Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
i've read that sonnet of shakespear's, and this is an excellent parody. i like it more than a bit, and seeing as i'm new to sonnets, i'll do my best on this piece:

line three has nine syllables, sorry, it doesn't work.

okay, seriously funny parody there. i LOVE this parody quite a bit and you did a good job spoofing shakepear. you use some pretty good metaphors here, very well written. however, you say that it braves the bathtubs stormy seas, and then go and say it drowns all your fears. it kind of gives you a mixed emotion there, something i'd try to avoid.

i may be new at this, but i'm not entirely sure i see a volta in here. i know shakespear's sonnet that you parodied (is that a word?) has a volta, but i don't really see one here. the volta is part of a sonnet, and you seem to be missing it, something i'd try to go and fix.

you have two lines with eleven syllables, which still works in a sonnet, so that's ok, but i see two lines that are the same thought. the rest of your lines are independant, so i can't see why these two wouldn'tbe, just a thought.

overall, excellent piece, deservant of it's fav
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 31, 2008
Thanks ;)
Yeah, line three is completely rubbish, but there's only one other word I can think of that rhymes with duck... :lmao:

Erm, yeah, the volta went out the window a bit =/ I got a bit carried away xD

Excellent critique, by the way!
Reply
:icondarkestpoetrylover:
darkestpoetrylover Featured By Owner May 31, 2008
you're welcome, and when i saw duck i was thinking 'what's going to be used?"
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2008
:lmao: Yup, there were some very dodgy moments trying to start it off xD
Reply
:icondarkestpoetrylover:
darkestpoetrylover Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2008
it was good though
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2008
Thanks ^^
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 31, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
I thought they were meant to have 5 beats 'iambic pentameter' which line 3 has, but it's still not the best.
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 31, 2008
Line 3 is trochaic pentameter, because, well... there was one other word I could think of that rhymed with duck...
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 31, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
low-ly cows and pigs lie in the muck
1 2 3 4 5

Does that explain that it has five beats.
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 31, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
oops, they were all layed out nice before i posted them... WTF?
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2008
:lmao: Yeah, me and :iconmaniacsquirrel72: ended up with some broken duck necks over that: it doesn't keep indentation ;P

I'm not quite sure what you're getting at... I'm perfectly aware that it has got five beats, but the stressed syllable of each beat comes at the beginning of the beat, so it's not iambic, it's called trochaic. And I am fixing it, and I know what I'm doing, so the little numbers were a bit pointless (I wrote the thing, I know where the beats are).

And if that sounds cross, it's nothing compared to the original post =( My anger is not directed at you, it's that Mrs Bayliss person who thinks she can tell me how to write poetry. Geez, I stabbed that full stop with like 889876 N of force...
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
Is the keyboard ok?
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconmelinjo:
Melinjo Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
Found this one while browsing 24-hour poetry, it made me laugh :) Great poem!
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
:lol: thanks :hug: Yeah, 24 hour poetry is one of my favourite haunts xD
Reply
:iconterrorcookie:
TerrorCookie Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
O' sweet and gentle rubber duck, thy yellow swab is fair - fair as a sea of frothed milk doth which gently embrace a maiden's hook.
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
:giggle: O' rubber duck, thy... *snigger* nope, no good, I just can't remain serious any longer :lmao:
:iconrudeboyskunkplz::iconrudeboyskunkplz2::iconrudeboyskunkplz3: =D
Reply
:iconterrorcookie:
TerrorCookie Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
:lmao:
Reply
:iconmaniacsquirrel72:
ManiacSquirrel72 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
:rofl: xD
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
:rubberduck: I bet that smiley doesn't work...
:iconrudeboyskunkplz::iconrudeboyskunkplz2::iconrudeboyskunkplz3:
=D
Reply
:iconmaniacsquirrel72:
ManiacSquirrel72 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
:rubberduckie: Maybe that one?

Your welcome! :D
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
Nope... :dcuk :ducky :duck: ah wait, I spelled duck wrong on the first one... :duck: :duckpond:
Reply
:iconmaniacsquirrel72:
ManiacSquirrel72 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
:iconrubberduckplz: :iconrubberduckieplz: :iconduckplz:
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
YES!! It's a duck!
:iconduckplz: :iconduckplz: :iconduckplz:

:iconducklingplz: ??
Reply
:iconmaniacsquirrel72:
ManiacSquirrel72 Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
:iconbabyducksplz: :iconbaby-ducks: :iconducklings: :iconbirdsplz: :iconrubberplz: :iconplasticduckplz: :iconbathtoyplz: :iconrubber-duck-plz: :iconducksplz:
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
We don't seem to be having much luck, do we? :lmao:
Ducks are shockingly under-represented! I should make a rubberduckplz account really, but I think there's an IP ban round here :eyepopping:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
Dw'in cytuno!!! lolz!! Rubber ducks are very noble!!
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 28, 2008
And their yellowness is unsurpassed!
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
For if their yellowness gets unsurpassed, they get yellower with envy!
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 29, 2008
Ho yes, not a pretty sight!!
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 30, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
Unless you are a lady duck, where yellowness is the sign of a good mate.
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
Well yes... hang on a minute, how do you know? Are you a lady duck?
Reply
:iconspace-man619:
space-man619 Featured By Owner May 30, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
Maybe...
Reply
:iconcuoha:
cuoha Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
*snort*
Reply
:iconshadow-chan93:
Shadow-chan93 Featured By Owner May 28, 2008  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Shakespeare, he? it sounds a little bit strange... your poems are better...
Reply
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